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Archive for June 20th, 2008
A businessman met a beautiful girl and agreed to spend the night with her
for $500. They did their thing , and , before he left , he told her that he
did not have any cash with him , but he would have his secretary write
acheque and mail it to her , calling the payment ‘RENT FOR APARTMENT.’
On the way to the office , he regretted what he had done , realizing that the
whole event had not been worth the price. So he had his secretary send a
cheque for $250 and enclose the
following typed note:
‘Dear Madam:
Enclosed find a cheque for $250 for rent of your apartment. I am not
sending the amount agreed upon , because when I rented the place , I was
under the impression that:
#1 - it had never been occupied;
#2 - there was plenty of heat; and
#3 - it was small enough to make me feel cosy and at home.
However , I found out that
#1 - it had been previously occupied ,
#2 - there wasn’t any heat , and
#3 - it was too large.’
Upon receipt of the note , the girl immediately returned the cheque for $250
with the following note:
‘Dear Sir:
#1 - I cannot understand how you could expect a beautiful apartment to
remain unoccupied indefinitely.
#2 - As for the heat , there is plenty of it , if you know how to turnit on.
#3 - Regarding the space , the apartment is indeed of regular size , but if
you don’t have enough furniture to fill it , please do not blame the
management.
Please send the rent in full or we will be forced to contact your present
landlady”.
Dear Dr. Phil,
When I retired, I could hardly wait to spend time enjoying my favourite pastime — bass fishing.
I got my own little fishing boat and tried to get my wife to join me, but she just never liked fishing.
Finally, one day at the Bait & Tackle Shop,
I got to talking to Sam, the shop owner, who it turned out loves bass fishing as much as I do.
We quickly became fishing buddies. As I said,
the wife doesn’t care about fishing. She not only refuses to join us, but she always complains that I spend too much time fishing.
A few weeks ago, Sam and I had the best
fishing trip ever. Not only did I catch the most beautiful bass you’ve ever seen, only a few minutes later Sam must have caught his twin brother!
So I took a picture of Sam holding up the two nice bass that we caught and showed the picture to the wife hoping that maybe she’d get interested. Instead she says she doesn’t want me to go fishing at all anymore! And she wants me to sell the boat! I think she just doesn’t like to see me enjoying myself.
What would you do? Tell the wife to forget it
and continue my hobby or quit fishing and
sell the boat as she insists?
Thanks,
P.S. Enclosed is a picture of Sam
with the two bass we caught.
Dear Fisherman,
Get rid of that narrow-minded wife.
That’s a nice pair of bass!
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