1. If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?

2. Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?

3. If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?

4. If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren’t people from Holland called Holes?

5. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?

6. Why the man who invests all your money called a broker?

7. If horrific means to make horrible, does terrific mean to Make terrible?

8. Why is it called building when it is already built?

9. If a book about failures doesn’t sell, is it a success?

10. If you’re not supposed to drink and drive, then why do Bars have parking lots?

11. If you take an Oriental person and spin him around Several times, does he become disoriented?

12. If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?? Human ???

I was born intelligent -
education ruined me.
… ……… ……… ……… …..

Practice makes perfect…..
But nobody’s perfect….. .
so why practice?
… ……… ……… ……… …..

If it’s true that we are here to help
others,
then what exactly are the others here
for?

………… ……… ……… ……

Since light travels faster than sound,
people appear bright until you hear
them speak.

… ……… ……… ……… …..

How come “abbreviated” is such a long
word?
… ……… ……… ……… …..

Money is not everything.
There’s Mastercard & Visa.

… ……… ……… ……… …..

If your father is a poor man,
it is your fate but,
if your father-in-law is a poor man,
it’s your stupidity.
… ……… ……… ……… …..

One should love animals.
They are so tasty.

… ……… ……… ……… …..

Behind every successful man, there is
a woman
And behind every unsuccessful man,
there are two.

… ……… ……… ……… …..

Every man should marry.
After all, happiness is not the only
thing in
life.

… ……… ……… ……… …..
 
The wise never marry.
and when they marry they become
otherwise.

… ……… ……… ……… …..

Success is a relative term.
It brings so many relatives.

… ……… ……… ……… …..

Never put off the work till tomorrow
what you can put off today.

… ……… ……… ……… …..

“Your future depends on your dreams”
So go to sleep
… ……… ……… ……… …..

There should be a better way to start
a day
Than waking up every morning

… ……… ……… ……… …..

“Hard work never killed anybody”
But why take the risk
… ……… ……… ……… …..

“Work fascinates me”
I can look at it for hours
… ……… ……… ……… …..

God made relatives;
Thank God we can choose our friends.
… ……… ……… ……… …..

The more you learn, the more you know,
The more you know, the more you forget
The more you forget, the less you know
So.. why learn.

… ……… ……… ……… …..

A bus station is where a bus stops.

A train station is where a train stops.

On my desk, I have a work station….
what more can I say……..